Ann R. Tosti

TOSTI Ann R. (nee Maita) age 95 of Springfield on April 27, 2018.She was the beloved wife of the late Frank L. Tosti Sr. and survived by her loving children Louis J. Tosti (Dr. Susan Tosti), Frank L. Tosti (Catherine), Roseann J. Wallace (Michael), and Robert McLaughlin (Nancy), her cherished grandchildren Julie, Bud, Katie, Joe, Christina, Keri, Jen, Kevin, Nick, Michael, Anne and the late Kevin, her adoring great-grandchildren; Skylar, Cassidy, Zachary, Lucas and Christopher, her dear sisters Ella Schluck, Dolores Perna. She was predeceased by her brothers Louis, Phillip and Dominic Maita and her sisters; Grace Poppa, Pauline DeMauro, Antoinette Oliva and Catherine Costobile.Relatives and friends are invited to her Viewing on Sunday, May 6, 2018 from 5:00-7:00pm at the Danjolell Memorial Home of Broomall, 2811 West Chester Pike, Broomall, PA 19008. Relatives and friends are also invited to her Visitation on Monday, May 7, 2018 at St. Dorothy’s Church 4910 Township Line Rd., Drexel Hill, PA19026 from 9:15-10:15am followed by her Funeral Mass at 10:30am. Inurnment SS. Peter and Paul Garden Mausoleum.In lieu of flowers contributions to St. Dorothy’s Church at the address above would be appreciated. Ann Tosti – Beloved Matriarch Antoinette (Ann) R..Tosti passed from this life on Friday, April 27 at the age of 95. As we celebrate her life we remember her for many things she leaves as her legacy to those she loved: Here is a reflection about that legacy from her adopted son, Robert “Zeke” McLaughlinDear Lou, Bud and Roseann,Been thinking about your Mom, you and your family a lot over the last couple months, knowing that your Mom was getting ready to go home. I’m glad we talked today so I could get my thoughts on paper. It’s a privilege to spend some time remembering your Mom, the most loving, accepting person I’ve ever known.Mostly, I’ve been thinking about the things I learned from her during my time at 435 Maris, and all the years since then.The Power of Family….Thoughts of Mom center on the Sunday gatherings at the pool. She was in her element there; it was her master creation – consisting of food, sun, swimming, tradition, the Phillies and family. The term “family” doesn’t really apply here because the Pool Gang included 2nd and 3rd cousins, remote in-laws and whoever you, Lou and Rose brought along. I have very clear memories of her cooking and organizing the feast in the kitchen, accompanied by Dolores, Cousin Julie, Lena. I know I’ve missed a few but the point is that the kitchen was filled with chat, laughter, instructions, questions and organized chaos. I wonder sometimes, how many meals came out of that kitchen on Sunday, how many people were fed by your Mom’s crew over the years, especially since Sundays included lunch and dinner. What a deal!! It wasn’t the food that made those Sundays such a great memory for so many people, it was so much more – the Phillies game on the TV, the 50-50, the sound of people in the pool, Norma and Tess holding court at the picnic table, whiffle ball games in the driveway. Without the love and generosity of your Mom, none of the fun and friendship would have found its way into the world and onto Maris Rd. for all 30+ years that it lasted. I think of all of that as her masterpiece, the physical expression of her love for her family and all of their friends. And an expression of her soul and who she was…love, acceptance, grace, affection.Over the years, I’ve come to understand that the most important thing you can give someone is your time and attention. Your Mom always had plenty of both for all 40+ people who came to the pool, or came to her house. Those gatherings taught me how families create a bond (and the strength) that comes from being part of a family like yours. And how much we rely on those bonds to get through the challenges and rough patches that are inevitable.I have so many memories of how she was so willing to share affection with those around her. For me, it was mostly by grabbing me by the face with both hands, and receiving a big kiss on the cheek (and a mini bear-hug) whenever we came to visit. For me, it was the most important thing I received from her, the love and acceptance that helped me overcome some difficult circumstances. She changed my life in the best way possible. I know that I became a better man, a better husband, and a better father as a result of being around her, and her family. I’m sure you know that, over these many years, there were many nieces, nephews, grandkids and friends who would say the same about your Mom. By relation or by friendship, we were all part of her “family”. We all received the two handed face grab-smooch-bear hug from your Mom. It was her gift to share with the world. You can imagine how much it meant to me when your Mom grabbed my kids’ faces whenever she saw them, then smooched and hugged them. Mom Mom and Pop Pop were much loved by our kids. And it wasn’t just the piles of Christmas gifts we hauled home each Thanksgiving, for so many years. It was the love and affection our kids felt whenever they were around your Mon and Dad. It was the fact that they had experienced the love from Grandparents. Every kid wants that and it was a beautiful gift from your parents, especially from your Mom. Her gifts were the opened on Christmas Eve, a tradition my kids will replicate, in honor of your Mom. Which brings me to…The Power of Christmas…Christmas was your Mom’s way of practicing and showing unconditional love for her family, and whoever happened to show up at Christmas. It was 1974, I think, the first Christmas I stayed at your house. I was overwhelmed by the way I was included in your celebration. It was a shock to receive gifts that morning, and to see (and remember) what a real family Christmas was like. I remember thinking “when did she have time to find gifts for me?” It was humbling and it was wonderful to participate in Christmas once again. The bigger point of this story is that your Mom lived for the Christmas season; it suited her personality like a glove. It was the opportunity to give her time and attention to so many people, one gift at a time. I loved that she never gave out her secrets: When did she start shopping? How many people were on her list at the peak of her shopping prowess? How did she keep track of what sizes people wore? Where did she keep all that stuff? How did she get all of that done? I didn’t want to know the answers, I liked the fact that her methods were shrouded in mystery, that each year was a sort of Christmas miracle. All that shopping and she made 4,000 pizzelles ever year. Who does that to themselves – hundreds of wrapped presents, Christmas dinners and thousands of pizelles? Only someone who was inspired by the joy of giving, the joy of Christmas and the love of family and friends. Your Mom owned Christmas; it was the truest reflection of who she was and how she loved all the people in her life. The Power to Influence People…Without being dramatic, I’ll always feel that my relationship with your family, and especially your Mom, changed the course of my life. I was always grateful to her and to your Dad for the time I spent at Maris Rd. and how I was included as a family member. But it wasn’t obvious how I’d changed until Nancy and I had our kids, and I was trying to model what I’d experienced as part of the Tosti family. Then I was able to look back on those years and see how I’d changed. From 21 year old guy with no obvious direction in life to a husband and father who was doing his best to provide a good for his family. How did that happen, from an early 20’s knucklehead to (mostly) responsible guy? It’s hard to say, I know I had some drive to succeed, I wanted to do well for Nancy and our kids, I wanted “things”. But I also wanted your Mom (and your Dad) to be proud of me. I always felt that I wanted to earn the time and attention she gave me, and the warmth and affection she showed me at a time in my life when I needed it most.Your Mom lived a wonderful life. Whatever sadness I’ve felt about her over the last few weeks is always overwhelmed by the gratitude I feel to have known her and to have been part of her family for so many years. And I’m in awe of you, Rose and Lou (and spouses, and kids ) for all you’ve done to take care of your Mom for so long.I know that she’s at peace now, with your Dad and their family members who have passed. I’m wishing you and your family a different kind of peace that comes from knowing that you have completed a very difficult part of your life with grace and dignity.With love and gratitude,Your brother,ZekeP.S. I still don’t know why I had to paint those rocks.